3 Weeks: Happy New Year

I am not big on celebrations. I appreciate the occasional fireworks and festivity, but in general I am just fine with quite thankfullness and reflection. Resolutions often arise out of such reflection. I'm learning to view resolutions as expressed intentions and an openness to receive with grace and thankfulness whatever life brings.

Today I am reflecting on the word "want".  It began with hearing someone say "I wouldn't want it any other way" to describe a new travel adventure. I wondered, what would be different if anything was not as they wanted.

In three weeks I will be heading out on my own travel adventure. All I am aware of is that I want to go. and I want to see certain people and places. Beyond that I am not sure what I want. Not even sure what to expect. I almost feel that having too much want beyond that would get in the way of fully appreciating the experience.  I certainly do not want anyone to get sick or hurt. But I am open to the possibility of that happening, just because things happen, and plan to role with whatever comes. 

Currently I am visiting my daughter in Michigan.  I had to postpone my road-trip a day because the first great winter storm hit the midwest the day I'd "wanted" to travel.  We had around six inches of snow.  I had to dig out of the drive way. After thirty minutes of shoveling, my dad suggested that maybe I shouldn't go. I was not going to be deterred.  I was pretty sure that beyond our poorly shoveled street that the roads were drivable.  It wasn't so much that I was thinking, I want this trip, so I'm going to do it.  It was more that i felt called to this trip, so whatever it took I would forge through. My wants were pretty irrelevant. I didn't want it to snow, I didn't want to shovel, I didn't want five hours of driving. I did want to go and see my friend and my daughter and I am so appreciating the journey.

I questioned my self for asking my friend, who has metastic cancer and doesn't expect to live beyond summer, what she wanted or hoped for in this leg of her journey with cancer. She wants to not have pain, but it is with her always. She wonders how she can appreciate the life around her and still within her through this pain. I find her courage in taking what comes as best as she can. Appreciating that some times things are better. Some times she is angry and frustrated, because none of this she wants. However, she doesn't dwell there in anger. It helps nothing. Her journey is a difficult one. I am grateful to her for sharing it.

We all must navigate our wants, our fears, our pains and discover our appreciation along the way. My expressed intention is to appreciate the journey as it unrolls. In whatever I do or say to be thankful to God through my Lord Jesus for the life that is given and the path that lies ahead.
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